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Making Way for Manhood 2.0

Therapists Push Back Against a Cultural Force

Chris Lyford

By Chris Lyford - Expanding the limited definition of masculinity is prime territory for therapists. But when running up against entrenched social mores, how can we bring about change? A few therapists have found creative ways to make space in therapy for raising more emotionally expressive young men.

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When Victims Victimize Others

Using Empathy to Help Abusers Make Amends

Noel Larson

By Noel Larson - Throughout my career, countless people have asked me how I can work with clients who’ve committed sexual abuse, murdered their wives, or broken their children’s bones and spirits. My answer has always been the same: all I have to do is remember and feel in my heart the traumatized children my clients once were.

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When Siblings Become Caregivers

Three Ways to Defuse Confrontation

Barry Jacobs

By Barry Jacobs - Nothing reveals the fault lines in sibling relationships like the seismic shift caused by an aging parent's sudden decline. Brothers and sisters can quickly become locked in conflict about what's best for Mom and Dad. Here's how to help them forget their old rivalries and cooperate with one another.

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Getting Comfortable with Discomfort

Using Art Therapy to Welcome the Unknown

Lisa Mitchell

By Lisa Mitchell - As both an art therapist and a marriage and family therapist, I believe that vulnerability, doubt, fear, and uncertainty—feelings most people try to avoid—are essential to getting unstuck. I teach clients how to move beyond "artist’s block," a state of being joylessly trapped in repetitive patterns and rigid expectations, and welcome the type of anxiety around the unknown that creativity invites.

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Selling Clients on Consent

...And Creating a Space for Men in the Age of #MeToo

Lauren Dockett

By Lauren Dockett - Privately shaken and sometimes concerned about their own complicity, many men are now worried about how the #MeToo movement will deepen the gulf of understanding between them and the women in their lives. But much of the secrecy and shame around sex for men and women could be mitigated by embracing a practice of consent.

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The Myths About Male Sexuality

Esther Perel on Challenging the Definitional Void of Manhood

Esther Perel

By Esther Perel - At this moment in our society, we’re experiencing a reckoning in the relationships between men and women, in the relationships between gender and anatomy, and in the relationships between sex and power. As therapists, we have a unique role at this moment. We need to help create a culture where men can express their needs in more than just the masculine code of sex.

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Engaging Ourselves Compassionately

Richard Schwartz Explains the IFS Approach to Mindfulness

Richard Schwartz

By Richard Schwartz - Mindfulness allows us to separate from our irrational self-statements. But what if it were possible to transform this inner drama, rather than just keep it at arm’s length, by taking mindfulness one step further?

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The Hearing

A Therapist Shares Her Most Transformative Session

Kirsten Lind Seal

In our own small way, the Networker has tried to revive the ancient, tribal practice of storytelling. At our third annual Symposium storytelling event, Kirsten Lind Seal shared the story of her attempt to rescue an immigrant client in a desperate situation.

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The Five Love Languages

An Interview with Gary Chapman

Ryan Howes

By Ryan Howes - In our romantic fantasies, the path to true love is smooth. But the couples we see in therapy aren’t always so adept. In his book, The Five Love Languages, Gary Chapman writes that people typically tend to express and understand emotional love through one of five “languages”—words of affirmation, quality time, personal gifts, acts of service, or physical touch.

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A Late-Life Lesson in Love

A Special Feature from Our Family Matters Department

Jeanne Folks

By Jeanne Folks - It's difficult to describe my shock as my mother opens the front door and ushers me into the house of my youth. She's aged-shrunken, with poorly dyed blond hair and the familiar rigidity in her hands and body. Her once beautifully straight teeth are crooked, and one tooth is missing. It's been eight years since my last visit.

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